Updated: Oct 4, 2022
Embracing Change?--You will not believe how direct this blog is about to get. I ask of you to be present with yourself, to not judge yourself, and most importantly to be honest with yourself. So here it goes!
Think about one or max two things that keep you up at night? Let me help you brainstorm a little bit: Is it your dream about changing that ONE thing you always wanted to-- but yet you fear making the next move? Is it the idea lingering about wanting to make a change in your career, but somehow you end up convincing yourself that you hate change so you decide to stay where you are at instead. Maybe, you have been wanting to change your eating habits once and for all but somehow you end up back where you started. Or perhaps is accepting the fact that you want to let that relationship go but the comfort of having someone in your life is a better feeling than feeling lonely?
Let me ask you the following question...What are the consequences of ignoring these dilemmas in your life?
Change is Inevitable
We have been sold this idea whether it came from society, life experiences, trauma, or your own limiting beliefs that CHANGE is bad. That change is WRONG. That change is DANGEROUS. That it is much better to live a "comfortable life" than not knowing how things will go? In simpler terms: F-E-A-R. Becoming a master of hiding your #fears can be learned so easily throughout the years that as soon as you hear the word change it triggers your "comfort zone" doesn't it? It triggers you, because it touches on that area that you feel so vulnerable about---(whispering voice: FEARS). I get it, we all have been there! Nevertheless, do you really want to continue questioning about these scenarios that creep in at night?-- Wondering what your life could have been like and continue to stay up at night overthinking, feeling anxious, stressed, or depressed about this? I didn't think so either.
Steps to Create the Changes You Want in Your Life?
1. Accept Personal Responsibility: This one is a though one but necessary to discuss! It is critical for you to acknowledge that you are fully accountable for the choices and the direction of your life moving forward. You can no longer blame others --- You will need to work on canceling this belief out of your thinking system (it will FREE you). Same goes for the anger and resentment you have built over the years from past experiences. There is a difference between forgiving and letting it go! Focus on building your personal formula for accepting personal responsibility and what works for you!
2. Handle Your Insecurities: This one is tougher but you appreciate honesty so let's keep it going! Due to past traumatic experiences, society expectations, needs not met, chaotic and unpredictable environment; your sense of felling secure and self-esteem were affected. The way you view the world, how you connect and communicate with others has a lot to do on how you experienced the world growing up. This is where working with a professional is KEY to your healing journey. You want to identify patterns that no longer serve a purpose in your life now, identify your limiting beliefs, how to navigate through your emotions, and most importantly how to believe and trust in yourself. In order to break through these insecurities, you have to accept the fact that you no longer need acceptance and approval of others, and to give yourself permission to see the good in you and your worth.
3. Become a Risk Taker: I didn't say it was going to be easy....but definitely NOT impossible! Fears are the forefront reason of why you dislike change so much. Fears happen to be your blockers to accept change. Think about these just to name a few: fear of rejection, failure, fear of hurting others or getting hurt, fear of not being perfect. Fears are everywhere, just ask for them and you will show up as the perfect excuse, at the perfect time to not do something. Fear and anxiety are essentially activating your nervous system (not in a good way) and there is a lot of stress and anxiety lingering in your body. Your body and mind are being impacted on a daily basis with these racing thoughts and overwhelming emotions, which results in-- you continuing to stay up at night feeling overwhelmed (do you see the cycle?).
Words of Inspiration:
“You are more than what your limiting beliefs make you think and feel about yourself. I know so---and YOU know this too. Now, this is your opportunity to BELIEVE it”.
You are the author of your own story, nobody knows you more than you know yourself. When you work on accepting and loving yourself from a space of warmth and nurture, then you allow your TRUE self to show up to the world without a mask. This is your signal of when you know that you have learned to love and celebrate all the parts of YOU that you once denied.
In my practice I approach therapy from an empathetic and compassionate integrative therapy approach. Know that in my practice I strive to provide clients with a high quality of care to meet your mental health needs and address these with warmth, respect, and not judgmentally. For more information about working with me one on one, please call or text to 480.741.8686 for a FREE phone call consultation or send me an email with your questions to firstname.lastname@example.org.